Okies, so right now I am researching Comme Des Garçons lumps and bumps collection.
Life is good. And I have been thinking a lot about wrongness. The big, big, gap between the outfit on the hanger, the outfit on the model and the outfit on my body. As a dysphoric bb I get real sad thinking of changing room breakdowns, where the clothes don't hang right on my stubborn silly body. There is a sense of the fantastic when it comes to fashion which can be brought down to earth with a crash, bang, wallop when it comes to, well, actually wearing the clothes. And that can really sucks. But I feel like Rei gets that y'kno?
So in the spirit of ill fitting outfits, clothes deforming bodies, bodies deforming clothes, here is a little list of things that (for me at least) bring an outfit back to the body:
1. Exposed bra straps. Read: ugly bra straps. Ugly white bra straps that are less bad a$$ Joseph Gordon Levitt lookalike and more: Hey! I have a womb! Gross!
2. Or worse: bra straps that have escaped the confines of my outfit entirely and loll gormlessly around my arm like a beached whale. Like a dog's tongue on a hot summer day: all drooly like. dribbly. (gross)
3. The loud, loud patterns of childhood socks that interrupt my performance of being a serious business man.
4. Faded black hoodies with toothpaste cuffs and cat fur sleeves.
5. And make up on the hood.
6. Taking photos with make up and realising that no make up will never be enough. See: asymmetrical cat eyes, smudged eyeliner on cheek, shiny nose, lip gloss on face, my face, my face, my face in general.
Hoorah! Six is an awkward number for a list. But this is an awkward post so hey!
Also new readers! Hello! Hi! Thank you for being here! I promise my face doesn't always look this weird. Maybe! I dunno. Blah.