Friday, 28 November 2014

poemz that are bad because i'm a prose person, but whatever


a little death is called a come
How Crude.
Tsk. Tsk.
Wags my finger (and my tail)
My brain a sad trombone noise
An anti-climax; burst balloon
Suicide has an airiness
Depression, a fleshiness.
Souls may be airy angels,
But depressions is a wet fish fart!
....a great weight indeed....

This isn't a good poem
(it is a bad poem)
but what were you expecting?


Kill yourself?
No kill myself!
Suicide and selfhood
are all squished up
There is no 'I'
without suicide


There **is** an I in suicide

I forget how the 
expression goes!
I forget a lot of things
these days!

This isn't a good poem
(it is a bad poem)
but what were you expecting?


depression doodles (also trich but that doesn't alliterate so)

doodle. doodle. doodle bug. i have a first from csm i swear lol.

Wednesday, 26 November 2014

╰☆╮ Bright Light City ╰☆╮(never ending post!)

-recreating my mickey mouse painting with a very non legit looking mouse man-
content warning: food

Hai! Hello! I am back from my trip and have finally gathered all my pictures together! I went to Vegas btw. I know, random! It was a family trip and I kind of tagged along haha.

Vegas is well...

how do I put this...

Vegas is more Disney than Disneyland, more capitalist than Wall Street, it is both an affirmation and a parody of the collective weirdness of America and it is glorious. It's techni-colour dislocation with it's area 51 grafitti, mock European monuments and dystopian voice overs (seriously they pipe robot voices and britney spears first three albums into the street as you walk by). To call it tacky is to miss the point. It is not tacky. Because it isn't imitating anything. (Except maybe the secret wishes of 9-5 business dudes). Rather it consumes existing tropes and tales to suit its own need, to create something new. Vegas in it's alien immortality, theme park in the desert-ness is how I imagine the afterlife. Vegas is awesome. Go there.
pure americana outside of Harrah's
and because I'm a rom com obsessed dork I obvs had to go to serendipity, yeah I'm cool and alternative!!
Harrah's signage made me feel like i was in a william eggleston photo book
Peanut butter, banana, bacon and maple syrup waffles, I KNOW, my waffles were so glorious they had fans! it was like being friends with a celebrity, strangers would come over and talk to me just to be *-*-*-NEAR-*-*-* them.
Dolly Parton fruit machines at Caesar's Palace was just too perfect, I mean seriously, this is ART people!
scary pegasus is scary
the fancy, fancy h and m where I bought my sparkly top from my last outfit post :)
the fall of atlantis X cheesecake factory
see also nike
pretty bellagio ceiling like rainbo sea urchins
inside of bellagio being super american and gilmore girl-sy
and the fountains to star spangled banner with fake eiffel towers could be a weird metaphor for global capitalism if i was zizek and not like a weird girl with a blog
more stars hollow vibes, also omg at georgia o'keefe painting in flowers, so random but also cool?
the shadow of abraham lincoln outside of johnny rockets
big elvis on a gem encrusted throne whilst a woman danced around him with maracas loving life to the tune of via las vegas (yes this actually happened)

my wedding photo
doesn't this remind you of matilda's mum and dad? in the movie version they actually got married in vegas!
more pretty signange
so John Waters?! like this could actually be his house?!
peacock float thing in the venetian
me being a dork in front of a giant waterfall in the venetian

carousel and hot air balloon made out of fresh flowers in the wynn too beautiful :')
the wynn! again! SO beautiful a Totoro forest spirit fairy palace!
me recurring with strangers in furry costumes is a recurring theme in this photo set evidently. wait. no that sounded weird. urghh.
wonka slot machine=hyperreal baudrillardian sugar high :)
oh and me in the magical forest thing, I should emphasise I DO HAVE FRIENDS AND FAMILY lol but they feel weird being up ---online--- so you just get me looking like a loner dork haha. I kind of like that my social life is private tho! Not everything should be public and online y'kno? 

Beetlejuice fruit machine!!
I won $8 at like two in the afternoon, because I am wild like that and I squeed and insisted on my mum taking my photos and everyone internally vomited in digust at my simplicity
me and nicholas cage because the bees...i'm actually pretty sure I'm the only person to have my photo taken with this wax work ever because umm why??
creepy stepford wife waxwork at Madame Tussauds!
me and frank who i think come to think of it was actually an all round not nice guy but at the time it seemed tourist-y and fitting?!
 ❤ the venetian ❤

ye olde pepsi mosaic, speaking of pepsi loved the halloween rivalry between cola, too much!

okay so i know johnny rockets is a chain and is probably as exotic as subway to the average american but we don't have it in the uk so it was a massive novelty to me!

hash house a go go s'mores mocha o.O This place is actually amazing, I went coz it was on man vs food lol (again I NEVER SAID I WAS COOL!!) but a ton of people have been here. Including, bizarrely, Bjork, I wonder what she ate?? I must know!!

size comparison to emphasise the sheer enormity of the french toast

upon closer inspection this wasn't based on the beloved david lynch show but was, and this is the worst phrase ever a 'breastaurant' (I kno!)But my brief moment of disappointment was balanced out by the idea of all the confused tv nerds wandering in, and being all finally! someone appreciates my screencap blog irl!

new york new york was super rad and awesome
BAT MAN FRUIT MACHINE!! Like every time I thought it couldn't be more of a plesantville parody it levelled up

Generic tourist shots of excalibur (great name!) and new york, new york. oh and the sign! coz of course!

I also paid a visit to the national atomic testing and area 51 museum because:

1. I'm a massive nerd


2. The collective fears of americana executed in all their earnestness is utterly fascinating, particularly during the 50's Bill Bryson's Life and Times of The Thunder Bolt Kid is a great resources on the Great American Apocalyspe as told in comic books and cereal boxes from town to town.

We also went to the Silverton Casino to see the mermaids which I thought would be really pretty (though obviously quite cheesy) but it was weird??


A true American oddity. The mermaid had an oxygen mask (like yeah I kno she has to breathe, but it felt very blue velvet?), a nose plug and goggles. I dislike -esques and -ians but I don't think it is lazy writing to compare this to David Lynch.

It was fascinating and strange and sad and altogether not what I expected, which if I was an early 20th century american author I would use as a heavy handed metaphor for the american dream. but i am no steinbeck so instead i am going to point out the fact there are Dorie fish in the background of this photo.

oh and there were sting rays! I fucking love sting rays! Love at it's face! Like the veil on a virgin mary but strangely comic too.

the rest of the hotel was more twin peaks than the twin peaks restaurant

me trying to embody the twin peaks theme song but failing because I have an uenxplained need to smile really earnestly in all photos
Okay nearly done! Phew! This blog post is starting to play out in real time! If you get to the end congratulations! I am high fiving my computer screen in your honour right this second!More capitalist bones in the neon graveyard, yeah!!

Breathes out, ok this is the last few!! a random mix of lights, the ceiling at the venetian and the volcano at the mirage!!